- Mad Gypsy's version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
- If Mad Gypsy donkey punches you, you will die. If Mad Gypsy' misses you with the
donkey punch, the wind behind the punch will tear out your pancreas.
- Mad Gypsy puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us. The only difference is, then he fucking kills people.
- Everybody loves Raymond. Except Mad Gypsy.
- Contrary to popular belief, the Titanic didn't hit an iceberg. The ship was off course and accidentally ran into Mad Gypsy while he was doing the backstroke across the Atlantic.
- Mad Gypsy got his drivers license at the age of 16. Seconds.
- The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Mad Gypsy. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
- Mad Gypsy’ sperm is so badass, he had sex with Nicole Kidman, and 7 months later she prematurely gave birth to a Ford Excursion.
- Mad Gypsy can win at solitaire with only 18 cards.
- Mad Gypsy once shat blood - the blood of 11,940 natives he had killed and eaten.
- Maslow's theory of higher needs does not apply to Mad Gypsy. He only has two needs: killing people
and finding people to kill.
- The truth will set you free. Unless Mad Gypsy has you, in which case, forget it buddy!
- For most people, home is where the heart is. For Mad Gypsy, home is where he stores his collection of human skulls.
- Kryptonite has been found to contain trace elements of Mad Gypsy donkey
punches to the face. This is why it is so deadly to Superman.
- Saddam Hussein was not found hiding in a "hole." Saddam was donkey punched in the head by Mad Gypsy in Kansas, which sent him through the earth, stopping just short of the surface of Iraq.
- Coroners refer to dead people as "ABG's". Already Been Gypsyed.
- Mad Gypsy doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just
donkey punches any cars that get too close.
- Mad Gypsy does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
- How many donkey punches does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Just one. From Mad Gypsy.
- Mad Gypsy doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
- The phrase 'break a leg' was originally coined by Mad Gypsy's co-stars in
Bukkake Dojo as a good luck charm, indicating that a broken leg might be the worst extent of their injuries. This never proved to be the case.
- If you rearrange the letters in "Mad Gypsy", they also spell "Sad
Pygmy". There were alot of sad pygmy's when Gypsy finished teaching them
how to be cannibals.
- Never look a gift Mad Gypsy in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
- Give a man a fish, and you will feed him for a day. Give a man anything that is better than a fish, and Mad Gypsy will beat his ass and take it.
- In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Mad Gypsy.
- Mad Gypsy used to play baseball. When Babe Ruth was hailed as the better player, Mad Gypsy killed him with a baseball bat to the throat. Lou Gehrig got off easy.
- The original title for Star Wars was "Death Star". Starring Mad Gypsy.
- Guantuanamo Bay, Cuba, is the military code-word for "Mad Gypsy' basement".
- The phrase 'balls to the wall' was originally conceived to describe Mad Gypsy entering any building smaller than an aircraft hangar.
- Mad Gypsy’s donkey punch is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.
- Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats. Mad Gypsy bites the heads off of
Siberian Tigers.
- He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Mad Gypsy, dies by the donkey punch.
- The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry. Even the worst-laid plans of Mad Gypsy come off without a hitch.
- The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Mad Gypsy in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.
- Mad Gypsy' donkey punch is so powerful, that on the set of Sidekicks he single-fistedly destroyed Jonathan Brandis' Career.
- Staring at Mad Gypsy for extended periods of time without proper eye protection will cause
blindness, and possibly foot sized bruises on the face.
- Mad Gypsy can taste lies.
- Mad Gypsy does not kick ass and take names. In fact, Mad Gypsy kicks ass and assigns the corpse a number. It is currently recorded to be in the billions.
- One time, Mad Gypsy accidentally stubbed his toe. It destroyed the entire state of Ohio.
- Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet, until Mad Gypsy donkey punched her into a glacier.
- In 1990, Mad Gypsy founded the non-profit organization "Punch Drugs Out of America". If the organization's name were "Donkey
Punch Drugs out of America", there wouldn't be any drugs in the Western Hemisphere. Anywhere.
- Mad Gypsy can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
- A movie scene depicting Mad Gypsy losing a fight with Bruce Lee was the product of history's most expensive visual effect. When adjusted for inflation, the effect cost more than the Gross National Product of Paraguay.
- Mad Gypsy does, in fact, live in a bukkake dojo.
- Mad Gypsy was once on Jeopardy. This show is notable in that it was the first occasion in Jeopardy history that Alex Trebek had appeared without a mustache. And a head.
- When Mad Gypsy works out on the Total Gym, the Total Gym feels like it's been raped.
- 4 out of 5 doctors fail to recommend Mad Gypsy as a solution to most problems. Also, 80% of doctors die unexplained, needlessly brutal deaths.
- Mad Gypsy can skeletonize a cow in two minutes.
- The only sure things are Death and Taxes…and when Mad Gypsy goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
- Mad Gypsy is currently engaged in a lawsuit with Miller brewing over the use
of the initial MGD for Miller Genuine Draft. MGD actually stands for Mad
Gypsy Draft, a brew manufactured from Gypsy's urine, the blood of a Tasmanian
devil, and a wolverine. The latter two had to be put in to tone down the
strength of the beer..
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The Mad Gypsy Facts T-shirt.
Guns don't kill people.
Mad Gypsy kills People.
The Mad Gypsy
Quotes T-shirt.
Mad Gypsy says "If I Squinky the Pope,
does that make
my dick a Holy Relic?"
What Would Mad Gypsy Do?.
Viva La Mad Gypsy!
Vote Mad Gypsy 2008
Vote Mad Gypsy 2008
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